Sunday, May 28, 2017

I Want to Ride My Bicycle, I Want to Ride My Bike


I started a new job a few months ago and my coworker has some amazing dating stories! Here's one of my favorites.

This date was a set-up. They had spoken briefly to decide when and where to meet for the date, but didn't know much about each other. My friend arrived at the restaurant and the boy says irritably, "Well finally! I've been waiting forever!" Right off the bat, she knew it was going to be a date to write home about. They got their food, ate, and decided it would be best to end the date there. He had proceeded to be a ray of sunshine throughout the whole date. She was excited to never see him again. When she got up to leave he told her he'd ridden his bike there and was wondering if she'd be willing to put his bike in her car and give him a ride home. His request was declined.

‘Give a girl the right shoes, and she can conquer the world.’ – Marilyn Monroe

Several years ago I went out with a boy who was sort of in my group of friends. I'd gotten to know him decently well over the last several months and knew he was a nice guy but that I probably wasn't interested. He asked me out and we ended up going to Chipotle then on to the Tulip Festival at Thanksgiving Point. There were a few things that stood out to me on this date and I'd like to present them in list form:
* He was the worst driver I've ever had the pleasure to ride with.
* He spent a good 15-20 minutes telling me about the various types and styles of shoes he has. I believe he said he has over 200 pairs of shoes.
* I realized I'm really not into a man who has that many pairs of shoes.
* The tulips were lovely.

Short, Sweet, and to the Point

One of the recent dates I went on paid for our Jamba Juice with a gift card (I'm so glad he didn't invest too much on the date) then left 20 minutes into the date. I guess when you know, you know!

Saturday, January 21, 2017

What's In Your Wallet?

I once went out to dinner with a man who somehow brought up his credit score. He never told me what it was, nor did I reveal mine to him. However, he proceeded to lecture me for a substantial amount of time about how my credit was subpar and to took it upon himself to advise me as to how to increase my credit score. He was an authority on the matter because, well, he had great credit! His credit was so good that someone once commented on it to him and he became a self-proclaimed credit guru. I was sure glad I could have a date where my finances were the main topic of conversation!

Green is the Color

GUEST POST! This story comes from my dear friend's dating history.

Several years ago, the subject of our story worked at a business owned by a family from another country. She was good at her job and helped bring success to the family business. The family grew to appreciate and revere this woman and her various abilities. And thus our story begins.

One day a co-worker and member of this family called her into the main office. She was told they had a request for her. As it turned out, this was more than a simple request. They offered this woman $10,000 a year if she would marry one of the men in the family. They offered to buy her a house, pay her way through school, and they even said she didn't have to live with her husband if she would just marry him. Unfortunately for her finances and his citizenship status, she refused.

Wednesday, June 22, 2016

He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not...

A few years ago I liked someone. He was mildly interested for a few months, we went out a time or two but it never materialized into anything. He actually shut me down rather harshly at one point. A few months after this ended I had totally moved on, as I thought he had as well. I was over at his apartment one night hanging out with his roommate. This boy walked in from a date that had been mediocre and noticed that I was there. He didn't say hi to anyone but me and was wildly excited that I was there.

A few days go by and I get a random text message from this guy, trying to strike up a conversation. He ended up asking me to go see a movie, seemed to be flirting and I was confused, but enjoyed the attention. We texted more over the days between the asking and the movie but it got to be less and less frequent. The night of the movie arrived and I hadn't heard from him until he picked me up. We went to the movie, he kept his arms firmly crossed the whole time, then he dropped me off without even parking by the curb or getting out of his car. He barely even said goodbye.

Fast forward a few days, his roommate was teasing me about this guy and I told him I wasn't interested in movie-guy, not even considering that this would be a poor decision. That was the WRONG move apparently. Movie-guy called me the next day, super angry that I hadn't told him to his face that I wasn't interested. We had an intense conversation about me not liking him, then it was all over. We were casual friends after this but the days of roller-coaster crushes were over. It was a very strange situation about which I still have many unanswered questions.

Sunday, April 10, 2016

Ogres Are Like Onions

Any man whose 1st and 2nd favorite movies are Shrek 1 and Shrek 2 will never be a good match for me.